By Sara Kjeldsen
Nineteen year-old Gabriel awakens in a bright room. Only moments ago he was trapped in a haunted forest. Or so he thinks. Two people in long, white coats unstrap him from a reclined chair. They tell him that he volunteered at the White Horizon Research Facility for a classified psychological study two weeks ago. The reality that he had known before was only a product of radiation, electrodes, and drugs.
He is not supposed to remember who he is or what he has done. The experiment is a failure. His memory of the real world returns along with the angry voices that have plagued him for five years. He knows what they want with him. He is a murderer.
One of the other volunteers - Gabriel`s cousin, Adeline - suddenly goes crazy and escapes the facility in a violent rage. Gabriel and two of the other particpants overhear the doctors debating on whether or not to euthanize the rest of them. Gabriel, Julia, and Caleb barely escape. To make matters worse, Adeline will not rest until she kills all three of them. Wherever they go, she finds them.
Gabriel will have to find a way to keep himself - and his new friends - alive without reverting back to murderous ways.
Possessed is a young adult supernatural thriller with a final word count of 56,000 words.
Thank you for taking the time to review my work.
Sara Flower Kjeldsen
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Public Critique: POSSESSED Query II
Sara has rewritten her query based on your fabulous comments. Please give the rewrite a look and offer any further advice or constructive criticism you may have. If you're interested in having a query, synopsis, or excerpt posted on Lit Rambles for critique, check out my contribute page.
Posted by Casey McCormick on Wednesday, October 20, 2010