By Lori Johnson
Dear (specific agent name):
Seventeen-year-old Taylor stumbles into chaos with an angelic face and an Irish brogue. Breandán turns out to be an angel with a vindictive family. And they have no tolerance for humans, especially her. She holds the power to destroy them.
Breandán casts a spell over Taylor, and she dumps her boyfriend. An elderly friend that lives in the nursing home where Taylor volunteers declares Taylor is the Heir and gives her a bracelet that could start a war between the legions of angels and demons. Her friend dies before Taylor learns the power of the bracelet, and why Breandán and his family are terrified of it. Little does Taylor know that she is nothing but a pawn for an evil conspiracy determined to destroy the angels.
Breandán is temporarily banished from Earth for loving a human, which gives the demons their chance to obtain the Heir’s power. The demons need human hosts, and Taylor’s ex-boyfriend and his friends succumb to their lure. Girls from the community disappear, including one of Taylor’s friends. What Taylor doesn’t know is that she’s next. After Taylor betrays her ex and reveals the demon within him, the demons declare open warfare on the angels. Somehow Taylor must find a way to save her friends and Breandán, even if it means her own death.
I am querying you because (personal touch here). My YA paranormal romance, Breathe, is complete at 90,000 words. Per your submission guidelines I have (followed directions here). Thank you for your time and consideration.
Sincerely, (personal info follows)
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Public Critique: Lori's Query
Lori's synopsis! She's super appreciative and would love it if you'd take a look at her query as well. If you have the time, please give it a read and offer any advice or constructive criticism you may have. If you're interested in having a query, synopsis, or excerpt posted on Lit Rambles for critique, check out my contribute page.
Posted by Casey McCormick on Monday, August 30, 2010